The ‘What The Actual F*&K’ feeling you have with our world right now has a funny name - and why that name may actually help you cope.
Well, it’s not actually funny, it’s German. Literally meaning “world-pain”, weltschmerz describes a deep sadness from the world that is compared to the world we wish it could be.
The former is our feelings of despair from life in general, the ongoing pandemic, job challenges, climate change, politics, etc, you name it. And the latter is our sadness as a result of what we believe the world could be, the “if only”. A world where the pandemic is actually over, or never happened. Where there is no ongoing war, or where our healthcare system is actually working, etc.
Last year, we were all languishing. The viral article by Adam Grant helped many realize that the emptiness of neither being happy nor sad, but “blah” had a name. And that name helped many recognize their feelings and move forward. But, it feels like we’ve moved from a state of non-emotion to one of very strong emotion. But it’s not positive. It’s painful.
It’s weltschmerz (pronounced velt-schmerz). Weltscshmerz. Weltschmerz.
Saying that name as an English speaking person a few times actually sounds kind of funny (and German). And with that funniness, comes a realization. The best antidote to despair, malaise, sorrow, weltschmerz, is a bit of laughter.
But one might be thinking that life feels too serious right now to be talking about laughing. But maybe a serious life, should take laughter seriously.
(Now there is a time and a place where laughter is not appropriate- and never at the expense of someone else).
Laughter in times of despair is not new, it dates back to ancient Rome. A theory why, is that it’s hard to feel angry/scared/upset and laugh at the same time. Freud explained in his “relief theory” that laughing serves as kind of a relief valve that lets out pent up emotion.
But beyond the philosophical, laughter helps us connect. To our friends, our family and especially to our kids. It also allows us to model healthy, happy behaviour. Laughter also helps boost our immune system and has been said to be the ‘best medicine’.
For better or worse, our emotions affect our kids. How we react, teaches our kids how to react. If we’re always stressed and anxious our kids pick up on that. Most kids don’t always know why we’re stressed (they don’t know Jordan in accounting is being annoying or that news story is triggering or maybe someone’s sick and we’re upset), they don’t always understand, they just see our expressions.
Some of my favourite childhood memories are being silly with my dad. I don't remember everything we did, but I remember the feeling. We laughed a lot. And I LOVED it.
I think about that now as a mom to two little kids. I think about how I want them to grow up with the same kind of feelings and memories. One of laughter and playfulness.
It’s been hard with the pandemic (and what seems like never-ending daily depressing news) but I try to be playful at least once a day (not positive or happy all the time, but always a moment of silliness together).
So I challenge you to try and laugh at least once a day with your kids for one week.
Even if you don’t feel like being silly, there’s ways to do it where other people do the work and you get to enjoy the sounds of giggles and laughter. Laughter is the only good contagious thing these days. So get your kid laughing, and you’ll likely laugh too.
Even the most serious person can do this without having to be silly themselves…
Here are 10 ways to add a little bit of laughter in under 10 minutes.
Watch a funny video with your kids
Challenge your kid to try to make you laugh
Read a funny book to them (like the Funniest Book You’ve Ever Red, which I just came out with).
Try a joke or two (look them up online if you don’t know any).
Take a 5 minute dance break with your kids and dance really badly (whether on purpose or not ;).
Surprise your kids with a funny hairdo or allow them to do your hair any way they want.
Sing a silly song.
Talk in a funny voice.
Act like a baby and pretend to cry on the floor.
Pretend to have no teeth and talk.
What’s your favourite way to get your kids to laugh? How do you like to connect with your kids? Let me know.
This article is inspired by my most recent book, the Funniest Book You’ve Ever Red- a book I wrote because I wanted to make kids laugh.
Fans of The Book With No Pictures will love this book with wholesome potty humour, puns and silly sounding words (like bamboozle and bupkis) to making funny faces and pretending to read in a British (or Canadian) accent.
The perfect combination of silly and wit, kids will want to read it over and over again (and you’ll have fun doing so).
The Funniest Book You’ve Ever Red exposes readers to six different types of humor and teaches different ways to make people laugh.